Portfolio life vs Inability to commit to one major focus vs Master of some vs Jack or Jill of all trades and how they relate to shame,empathy and self forgiveness

You know what I think may be even better than a good walk and talk with a dear friend! ?  A great solo walk / hike while listening to an inspiring  podcast.WHY? Because I can, without any psychological control issues choose exactly what I want to be listening to ! No need to do any  asking the right questions, choosing to shut up and only listen or  knowing  how to bare my own soul  (or not ) !

Good Life Project is a podcast that has never disappointed me .  I may have said it before but it is SO true.  ONLY problem is I am always in motion and do not write down /nor usually remember all the great references given in the podcast before I move onto doing other stuff.

 

Myth or fact : The way ti make anything look easy? By working at it, practice.
Myth or fact : The way to make anything look easy? By working at it, practice.

 

Today the  podcast  discussion  I listened to on Good Life Project with Jeff Goins ,”The Fine Art of Finding Your Calling ” is totally worth a listen to! This episode  really struck home on a subject near and dear to my heart and life. The term portfolio life has been totally in my face. Actually that is how this blog came to be! I wanted to see how I could ( pun intended ) weed out my passionate avocations/hobbies, interests/ hours of  time I spend without wanting to stop and resolve if and what would be appropriate addition to my vocations.    I also wanted  to see if this would be a great  way to reignite old passions of mine,to see if a new approach would be the spark I was looking for! SO here to to shaking up avocations/ hobbies/ and dabbling  with dreams of differnt income streams! Talk can be cheap, or expensive I guess once you get a great speaking circuit gig going 🙂

Listening to this  podcast today confirmed to me that being a  master of “some”  vs a  Jack or Jill of all trades was probably what I am  exploring… that is compared to my wearing the  “I am a photographer badge ” proudly as if I “should ” not confuse people with all the other wonderful creative outlets that were dear to me.

SO I get inside to do my notoriously long to do list ( which included make a point of doing a post on this site ) and then I go outside in the ( warm but not brutal heat) to work more on one of my other on going passions – the garden, and  got side tracked ( no surprise) while taking down the Sukkah … all while listening to the Big Magic Podcast with Elizabeth Gilbert. Yep , it was meant to be. Brene Brown and Elizabeth talking together truly reminds me of a great heart to heart with some of my dear friends. So what is the take away? MANY, lets see… I  will likely have to edit this post to really give more of the gist but a few of the loud and clears for me:

When we fail at a creative undertaking / or biz or ( fill in the blank of any major project you have invested bookoo time and bucks and emotions in)  it is not the time to negate inspiration. the antidote for that shame is empathy . And when it comes to discipline being the hallmark of getting these creative undertakings done think again how self forgiveness for what you did or did not accomplish today vs beating yourself up more that you did not show the proper amount of discipline.

Amen to that sistas.

And with that said . My big man work gloves that I wear on top of my skinny gloves to protect me from the pain of the puncture wounds from handling Argentinian Mesquite branchs with their 3 -4 inch thorns or the  Palm fronds that I just pulled off the Sukkah with their huge spikes…. seems spot on  for this particular blog post ( if I do say so myself ! )

 

 

What is the old saying something about turning, a new leaf , or a page or something

Fall_colors2576©_2013_Linda_Enger_Photography

So here we are . Oct 4 , 2015 . FINALLY fall is showing its Arizona Beauty. No fall colors here. Well unless you count the sukkah decorations from Michael’s crafts that attempt to satisfy the craving. Last few nights have FINALLY been tolerable to eat outside ( if you are like us and eat dinner late). Lunch in the sukkah  today , thanks to strategic planning with tree branches overhead was actually quite pleasant.  I could actually say working outside in the garden from 7am till 1pm with rain on and off began to feel like the reason gardeners garden !!! So here is to rain, and seeds and sprouts, and fall and moving on. Let the fall/winter sunny Arizona fun  begin!

when my swiss chard is reminding me of my spider veins I stop to ponder

I planted 3 kinds of chard this winter. The birds like them all !!!

And yes we all have part and parcel of our physical body that we can not photoshop out in daily life… but how important is it to be perfect? …. hmmm, yeah right like getting rid of my  spider veins is going to do it !

Hollyhocks rock

Light_pink_Hollyhock4475©_2015_Copyright_Linda_Enger_Photography

When I used to see Hollyhocks in gardens I visited I always felt them to be carefree, take me as I am kind of flower. I enjoyed their  vibrant personalities and planned one day to enjoy their company in my own yard. Well consistent with my gardening trials and errors I found last spring that out of one package of seeds that I attempted to grow I had one beautiful plant that agreed to stay with me in a simple 5 gallon Lowes Hardware bucket. I has flowered through the winter and now come march still at it. I dare not transplant it ( this advice I got from one of my helpful fellow gardeners on my Maricopa  gardening group. Now the great news….. I have other hollyhocks that are now itching to flower in big planter and in ground in other areas of property. Maybe I am onto  something  … I think the lama dung is helping  🙂

 

 

Thoughts while trimming bougainvillea

Thoughts_on_trimming_bougainvillea©_2015_Copyright_Linda_Enger_PhotographyThe last several days I have  been having a painful  heart to heart conversation with  our three frost trashed bougainvillea shrubs. . I have no desire to post what the winter brought to these shrubs and come March I know I have to go for the tough love. I hack away at the sharp spiked branches. I have way too many scratches and punctures from which have gone through shirts, gloves, and pants . Come June the plants will once again be showing off their  beautiful bracts . The flowers are actually tiny and white and the   yummy magenta color  display are actually considered leaves not  flowers!

So why the painting instead of a photo? As I was trying to maneuver the endless sharp stems into trash bags for yard waste, and putting  the  mulched up leaves for compost I kept thinking about a series of paintings that I was working on  around Valentine’s day. The paintings  have many layers of work into them and this 24 x30 painting reminded me of the branches and stems that so viciously protect their beautiful leaves and flowers.

FYI- I realized when I was messing with this image to post that I had quickly shot this on my iphone . I need to shoot it also with DSLR  and see the difference.

 

Peppering my thoughts.

5_green_sweet_peppers2014__©_Linda_Enger_PhotographyLinda_Enger_It has taken me many attempts at growing green peppers from seeds to get a few decent size organic peppers home grown … dare I try again?  It is that time of year. I missed starting  seeds inside in  pots but I have 2 sweet peppers and 2 hot pepper plants in pots outside that have survived our Scottsdale frosts. I will see what happens in the next few months.

Yep, I love multi tasking my chakra series of paintings as back grounds.

Pretty little priority conflict

Pros: Lutein content of cooked tomatoes, vit C, fiber, yummy, pretty, excited cause I got them to grow and harvest despite all the odds against me in garden including predators, weather, water, etc etc. yellow_pear_and_cherry_tomatoes_on_yellow_paint2014__©_Linda_Enger_Photography_web#2

Cons: Darn it I have known this for decades but it is a really hard one to deal with. Tomatoes … ah a great one ( which is hard to find in a store) can bring me back to fond childhood memories of buying tomatoes in the midwest from a stand by the side of the road… yep they existed. Those precious juicy , drippy red gems with salt and pepper could be a meal in itself. GRRRR they are one of the nightshade family of veggies, also called  the Solanaceae family . Sadly this also includes  potatoes, all types of peppers, and eggplant.  After 4 years of finally trying to grow big tomatoes I was successful with small  cherry and pear shaped ones, and very small “big version” one. Now dare I put any plants in the ground before my window of spring planting opportunity is over? I am trying not to . I already have 3 tomato plants that are still producing since put in my garden in Oct. Will it last? And what about the yellow pepper plant that is putting out tiny fruit still. And the several pots of 2 kinds of eggplant that held up through the frost and are putting out flowers  and the 2 hot pepper plants?  So which is more important to me? Growing organic veggies that I love to eat or trying to see if I can do a 3 month diet without 4 things I love organic Peppers of all kinds, all tomatoes and sauces, eggplant and potatoes, and then what about what I eat out? OR the quick thrown together pizza ( ugh, not going into the gluten or cheese conversation here )… dare I see if I can not consume ANY Of these veggies for 3 months to see if it helps with my headaches, stiffness, aches and pains and spinal  arthritis ? HMMM what to do ?  GRRRRR….too many foods to eliminate to be “healthy” and live in a sustainable world. GRRRR.